Thursday, August 16, 2007
We must calm down
Thank you for reading my blog. If you have difficulty seeing your grandchildren, or have any views about my situation, I would welcome your messages by e-mail through this blog site. If you wish, just use a first name or a nickname and your identity will be protected, like mine – “Grandad Kit.”
Dear “Tom”
We must calm down
I am you other grandfather, the one you have never met. You are four years old, and although I have never met you, I love you dearly and always will. You are my flesh and blood, and always will be. We will meet one day, I am sure. I am writing this daily "blog" to you to make up for the fact that I can't speak to you right now. I hope that one day you will be able to read this.
Phew! We are in a state. Nana Ann is still suffering with the abscess on her tooth, and Grandad had to go to the dentist today for the second instalment of my root filling - just one more to go now. It wasn't too bad, but Nana Ann is still in a bad way. She's been to work today, but doesn't want to take too many pain killers. On top of all that, we've got to woory about whether everything will go all right this weekend when - fingers crossed - we get to see you for the first time.
I've sent an email to your Mam (to her new email address) but she hasn't replied as yet. Nana Ann pointed out something I said in my email to your Mam that wasn't quite right, but there's nothing I can do about it now. For most people most of the time a little thing like that wouldn't matter, but just now every single word is important, even one word - whether said or written down - could be taken the wrong way, and then we'd be back to square one.
But th die is cast. I'm catching the train to London first thing in the morning. Then it's a long session in the British Library, then meet up with Nana Ann. On Saturday we're off to Brighton on business, then on Sunday it's the big day, we hope. But your Mam hasn't said yes to any arrangements yet, and that's the important thing. Hopefully I will hear from her tomorrow. There's so many things we want to know about you, if we do meet up, Grandad and Nana Ann will have to be very careful only to take things one step at a time and not try to do too many things at once - but we're only human!
Sunday will come soon enough
Love from
Grandad Kit and Nana Ann
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Comments
oh, grandad kit and nana ann,
how i will have my fingers crossed for you all on sunday and oh how i wish it might be me!!!
i read an article in the paper a few months ago about fathers who have difficulty seeing their children and one father said that although he got on with life and enjoyed it, there was always something there not quite right as if life was not quite complete and i think it is similar to the feeling that grandparents have when they cannot see their grandchildren.
i quite often look in on your blog and get some comfort from it although i think the circumstances are quite different.
it really struck me tonight how you have not got your hopes up and are just going to take things slowly. when i was first married in the 1970's i used to get really cross with my husband because i felt he was always pessimistic and i was the eternal optimist but i can really empathise with how you feel at the moment. i guess it's part of life's little learning curves isn't it. it also struck me how we have to be so careful about what we say in case it is misconstrued and actually this is one of the things that i enjoy about not seeing my family - not having to worry over every little comment!!!
i will look in next week and really hope there is good news.
keep smiling,
sue (i wrote earlier in the year about matthew)
Grandad Kit writes
Dear Sue
Thank you for writing again, and again for your kind comments. We've been this way too many times before, in slightly different ways perhaps, to get our hope up too high. The first thing is to make sure we get to meet Tom and his parents. But that's just the start. Then, as you rightly point out, we have to be very, very careful about what we say. In a way, we shouldn't have to "watch our toingues" all the time, but really there's no alternative - if we want to maintain or (in our case) restart contacts.
People are funny, aren't they!
All the best
Grandad Kit
Posted by: sue | Friday, August 17, 2007
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